Consumer Alert: Oscar Mayer Bacon

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My statement is simple. If you care in any way about bacon, do not buy Oscar Mayer ‘bacon’. It is not bacon. It is a haunted, poisonous falsehood. When you see a full size package of it on sale for $2, you may be tempted, as I was. Be strong and plunk down the extra $.79 for something else, anything else.

My estimates on the contents of this product are as follows:

1. 43% sodium

2. 55% water

3. 1% indeterminate animal fiber

Oh, does that not add up? Neither does this bacon.

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7 Responses to “Consumer Alert: Oscar Mayer Bacon”

  1. The Sage Says:

    Try turkey bacon. It is processed from turkey-pigs. Sometimes called “squeal-gobblers,” these very fat birds also love to wallow in mud. They have long necks and a snout instead of a bill.
    They have wings and curly tails, but cannot produce enough lift to ever fly. This is fortunate, since they produce copious amounts of doo-doo. You wouldn’t want to see this stuff airborne.

  2. Leigh Ann Says:

    I tried a different mode last night… I bought 1 pkg of sausage and 1 pkg of non-meat product made to look like sausage… we did a taste test… everyone who tasted the non-meat made a face like they just sucked on a lemon, so in the final analysis… you could say it sucks… Stick with the real thing!

  3. The Sage Says:

    So look for the label “non.” A good bet that anything with that sticker on it is not the real thing in any way, shape, or form. How about “generic?” As in real generic Turkey? Generic turkeys are raised differently than say “Butterball” birds. They feed the Butterball’s with home-made creamy butter only. Generic turkeys are actually clones of one another. Once you clone a batch of about one-hundred, they become genetically-diminished birds. They more resemble chickens, but the meat is lean and stiff, as if the bird died in the wild and was then cooked after several days. “Avoid the non,” as my mother always advised. Reality meat, that’s the ticket (if you ever want your own cooking show).

  4. brett Says:

    tobes, we’re still in good supply of 100% natural strahm farms bacon. i think we could spare a package for you. that way you can enjoy your blt’s w/o fear or doubt.

  5. getitgotitgoods Says:

    buy your bacon from Wild Oats from now on. I promise a love affair (with the bacon) will ensue.

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  7. rjs Says:

    You should get facts before making statements i have been working at a facility for over ten years now that produces oscar mayer bacon pork bellies are smoked the old fashioned way with wood and not sprayed with a chemical smoke flavoring like others and by the way if the sodium bothers you then try the lower sodium oscar mayer bacon that we also produce but i will eat the bacon with sodium and smokedim naturally before other brands covered in chemicals

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